4 comments on “Cheating

  1. Wow…Extremely honest and self revealing,  those are hard things to admit to even yourself.  Bravo that you can be honest about it now ans own your behavior.It is sad that you could not share these things with T.  She may have been open to experimenting and playing with you.I totally agree with you that cheating is doing anything your partner believes you are not doing or the converse.  If you can't do it with them beside you, then there is a problem.  Too many times people justify things differently.I admire your courage to look withing yourself in this way.

  2. This is pretty fantastic and amazing. And I think you did it successfully without crossing any of the lines you've set for yourself re: T.This opens up so many different channels in my brain, and I just don't know which one to follow. One thing that sticks out is the attempt/desire to rationalize actions. And the definition/re-definition of cheating. But a huge part of my reaction has to do with the limitations of my experience, and I feel like any thoughts I have on this are naive and uninformed.

  3. There's one caveat I would offer – not so much from my own experience, but pertaining to others. In some instances, in some relationships, it simply is NOT possible to bring a partner along – one partner tries, the other resists. In that case, I'm not sure that I think there's always and absolutely a correct solution that doesn't involve cheating. C.f. Dan Savage.But I don't claim that exemption/exception/explanation.

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