Liza and I have been trading writing assignments. I gave her “jealousy,” and she handled it winningly (I recommend reading her thoughts on it). She gave me “cheating”: “I'm curious about your history with cheating–only on T, or was it a pattern in relationships? When was the first time it happened, and what did it feel like afterward?”
The short answer to the question is no, it wasn’t a pattern. In my relationships prior to T, I only cheated once, a few months into a relationship when I was 17. It was devastating to both of us, and I never did it again. Including through a long, sexless relationship in my 20s that looked a lot like a 20-year-old marriage (as opposed to a marriage between 20-year-olds).